Women’s Anatomy of Arousal

Resources & Home Play Assignments

Week Two: Connections, Bones and Erectile Network

Text Resources

Super Sexuality: Seven Tips for Spectacular Sex and Outrageous Orgasms
Three Tips to Experience & Expand Female Orgasm
The Elusive Female Orgasm: 5 Tips to Awesome Female Orgasm The Elusive Female Orgasm Part Two: Five More Tips to Orgasm-ability

Video Resources

Just Take a Couple of Slow Deep Breaths
Vibrators Part One: Will Using a Vibrator Ruin Sex with Real-Life Partners?
Vibrators Part Two: Will Using a Vibrator Cause Nerve Damage?
Vibrators Part Three: The Hitachi Magic Wand
Simple Sexy Sound
Succulent Sexcraft Mini Class – Introduction
Succulent Sexcraft Mini Class – Part 1: Awareness and Breath
Succulent Sexcraft Mini Class – Part 2: Sound & Intention
Succulent Sexcraft Mini Class – Part 3: Move It!

Images [Home Play Assignments Below!]

Your Home Play Assignment(s)

Female Anatomy Tour: Solo

Go on your tour. Do it solo first.

If you have a partner, go on the tour together in your second or subsequent rounds.

Take your time.

Set up so you can see and feel the changes. (Use a magnifying mirror and a light or use a video camera/phone and big screen.)

Remember: Do your homeplay tour in three stages. Use whatever forms of erotic stimulation you like to get to Stages 2 and 3. If you’re doing this with a partner, they can help!

At each stage, look at and feel all of the structures. Notice the size, shape, color, sensations, sensitivity, position.

The Stages:

1. Not aroused
2. Medium level arousal (after 15 – 20 minutes, perhaps?)
3. High level arousal (after 30 – 45 minutes!)

1. Not Aroused

Review the structures from session one: The external vulva: mons, outer lips, inner lips, head of the clitoris, hood of the clitoris, urethral opening and vaginal opening. Start by looking at all of your external genital parts in a state of non-arousal. Feel everything. Look at all the parts you can see. Notice the sensations.
Check out the structures that we reviewed in session two: the bony prominences, the feeling and movements of the pelvic floor muscles, all of the parts of the Female Erectile Network (FEN): the three parts of the clitoris: head, shaft and the legs; the vestibular bulbs; the urethral (upper) sponge) and the perineal (lower) sponge.

2. Medium Arousal

• Play with yourself. Have fun, exciting stimulating, relaxing, pleasurable solo sex.

A few tips:

Close your eyes. Go inside.
Attend and attune to your sensations. Focus on pleasure & arousal.
Play with self-touch. Be creative and have fun. Let exploration and pleasure be your guide.
Enhance your erotic trance with your breath and by making sounds of pleasure.
Stimulate all of the parts of the FEN.
Stop at mid-level arousal and look again. Feel everything. Note the size, shape, color, sensations, sensitivity, position. Especially notice the sensations and how the sensitivity may have changed with arousal.

3. High Level, Deep Arousal

Play some more. Take your time and be sure that you attend to all of the parts. Get to high-level deep arousal.
Stop. Look, feel, notice. Note the size, shape, color, sensations, sensitivity, position. Especially notice the sensations and how the sensitivity may have changed with arousal.
Appreciate!!!

Optional (but encouraged) Continue stimulation through to orgasm(s). Notice if there’s any difference with how that feels to you.

Post-Tour: When you’re done make some notes: what did you see and feel?

Partner Tour: After you’ve done your solo tour, go on the tour again, this time sharing the journey with your partner(s).

Men: Be patient, awe-filled, appreciative, complimentary and genuinely positive about everything your partner shows you and shares with you.

If you haven’t explored your resources and readings from the first session, do it now!

Pelvic Floor Play

The muscles that embrace your genitals can squeeze, lift, push, pull, suck, expel, hold and generally fondle your own sweet sexy bits (and, should you be with a partner, someone else’s).

Your inner trampoline is a major player in your own arousal orchestra. Train your inner muscles well and you’ll be astonished at their skill, dexterity and capacity to enhance your erotic adventures.

For your early experiments, use every part of your pelvic floor muscles (PFMs)—every layer, front to back, side-to-side. This includes the muscles that help you hold and release your urine, that led you hold in and push out poop and that surround and snugly hug your genitals. As you become more skilled, you can start to differentiate the movements of specific muscles and develop more precise muscle skills.

Play & Practice: Am I Doing It Right?

To get the most from your pelvic floor muscle practices, get all your pelvic floor muscles involved. Here are a few tips to help you do that.

Take a look at images of all the muscles so you can visualize them.
Look at your crotch in a mirror and watch your genitals moving.
Use your hands as external biofeedback devices by putting them on and/or in your body so you can feel the muscles moving.

And remember: There’s no ‘right’ way to play.

The Pleasure Pulse

To tone and train your pelvic pleasure muscles, simply tighten and release them. Start slowly and then go faster until you’re going as fast as possible. When your pelvic floor muscles feel tired, take a short break, then repeat. Do a few short Pleasure Pulse sessions daily over a week or so and soon you’ll be able to go so fast it’ll feel like you’re fluttering them.

During orgasm, your pelvic floor muscles naturally go into a pattern of rapid highly pleasurable contractions. The Pleasure Pulse exercise builds muscle stamina so you can have longer, stronger orgasms. Not only that, but if you consciously flutter your PFMs while you’re coming, you’ll enhance the intensity and duration of your orgasm. Keep pulsing and you can keep coming! Think of it as sex muscle ‘booty camp!’

Pelvic Floor Pumps

Here’s the basic Pelvic Floor Pump. Tighten the whole group of muscles by pulling them up, as if your bottom is an elevator going up while simultaneously squeezing them together like a drawstring. Then let the whole group relax down and release open. Repeat, repeat, repeat!

Suggestions:

Squeeze and release in a steady rhythm for a minute or two, then work your way up to going longer. See how many reps you can do comfortably. Try to do 20-30 squeezes, three times a day.
Experiment with different speeds. Try practices where you see how slowly you can go from relaxed to tight and how slowly you can release. See how fast you can go.
Try playing with patterns, like three super-slow squeezes followed by ten super-fast ones.
Put on your favorite dance music and pulse your ‘basement’ muscles to the beat.

As with other practices, experiment with PF pumps when not aroused and at various stages in your erotic journey. PF pumps are especially useful if you want to bring more energy and attention to your genitals and ramp up your arousal level.

Let pleasure be your main guide and motivator.

Pelvic Floor Play When Aroused

Now that you know where your pelvic floor muscles are and where all the parts of your erectile network are, combine them in an arousal and pleasure game.

This is usually easiest to do after you’re moderately aroused and your FEN is engorged. Play with your PFM and tune in to all the structures that make up your FEN. Start with a simple squeeze and release and notice how it feels. Really good, probably! That’s because your FEN is sandwiched in between the muscle layers, so every time you play with the muscles, you’re playing with your erectile tissue.

See if you can get even more specific. Try to find the muscles that stimulate specific parts of your network. It may help to place your hand on the outer vulva or put a finger or fingers inside your vagina. Or both!

Enjoy.

PS. As suggested above, I highly recommend putting on some of your favorite dance music, closing your eyes (or putting on a blindfold) and dancing along with the music, using only your pelvic floor muscles.

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