Bliss Dance by Tony Webster

Bliss Dance by Tony Webster

Sizzling Sacred Sex Home Play

Session One: Discovering the Sacred

We are launched on our co-learning journey into the realms of sacred sex! Woo-hoo!

Here are your home play suggestions, with a simple overview followed by more detailed information.

May you enjoy your sacred pleasure as you explore Eros in our first week together!

Resources

Our “Juicy Bits” Video Blogs

My free Ask the Sex Teacher Anything About Sacred Sex webinar. (About one hour long)

Text Blogs

More Resources

Yummy Books, Product Sources & Useful Websites: Wholistic Sexuality Resources

Your Home Play Overview

1.  Uncovering Stories That Need Changing

You may want to start with the first assignment, Exploring Your Spiritual/Religious Stories About Sex to help you focus on what you want to change.

2.  Create Conscious Intentions

Create intentions. Three is often a good number to work with to start, although you can have as few or as many as you like. See Using Sacred Intention to Make Sex Divine for more info and ideas.

3.  Make Commitments

Our course time flies by fast. One of the best ways to make the most of it is to make firm commitments to yourself (and with your partner/s if you have them). Schedule multiple practice sessions. They can be of varying time spans although it’s useful to have at least one or two of your sessions be longer ones of one to three hours. You could do something like have a 3-hour session every Sunday, with 20-minute daily morning or evening practice time and a 1-hour Thursday evening slot. Write these into your calendar just like any other important appointment. If you have a partner, schedule some solo time and some partner time.

Concretize your practice commitments. I urge you write these down.

Examples:
I will make a sacred sexual altar dedicated to loving my genitals (or whatever you want to start with).
I will use my intentions repeatedly during my erotic experiences.
I will create a simple ritual of meditating on my altar and repeating my intentions before and after all my erotic sessions.

4.  Use Your Spirit ToolsVenus & Toolkit with detailsV5

Download, print and review your handouts:

Create altars. (See: Your Altar to Eros)

And/or make a sacred erotic space. (See: Creating Sacred Ground)

Use more tools: Add sound (See: Sacred Sound below. There’s also a short video blog on the subject.) You can also add smell or other sensual delights to your practice.

5.  Run Experiments

  • Try things. Start with whatever resonates with you, what excites you and gets you jazzed up.
  • If it works to enhance your erotic experience, awesome—keep doing it. If not, try different things.
  • Keep trying and adding more tools but don’t overload. Go step by step.
  • Note what works for you and what doesn’t. What issues arise? What inspirations? Challenges?
  • Journal, make notes, create art, write poems, make-up songs, take pictures …

 6.  Be A Community

Bring your questions, challenges, ideas, and experiences back to our community. I strongly encourage you to attend the live sessions if you possibly can. That way we can all share there.

I also encourage you to join our private Facebook Group, where you can share, comment, question and support each other. (You need to send me a Friend Request AND a Message that you’re in this class).

7.  Enjoy!

Have pleasurable, sensual, delightful, steamy, luscious erotic experiences. Enjoy!

Your Home Play Details

Exploring Your Spiritual/Religious Stories About Sex

You can write these out, tell it to someone else or just think it through.

Fill in these sentence stubs.

  • The religious tradition(s) I grew up with was (were) …
  • And the main messages I got about sex were …

The specific messages I received from those teachings:

  • My body is …
  • My genitals are …
  • Sex is …
  • People of my gender are …
  • People of the ‘opposite’ gender are …
  • Desire is …
  • Pleasure is …

Create A Super-Short Story

Write, tell or think about an experience where your spiritual/religious institutions affected you. Aim for 1-2 paragraphs to distill the essence of the experience.

What did you learn that has had a big effect on your sexuality?

Do you remember a pivotal moment when something happened that related to sexuality and you felt shamed or repressed? (Or any other powerful emotions?)

Using Sacred Intention to Make Sex Divine

Before your next sexual encounter, take a few moments and create a spiritual intention for your experience.

Create sexual spiritual intentions. You can simply repeat them silently in your mind. You can speak them aloud. You can write them down and then read and re-read them.

Here are a few suggestions:

  • “Sex is sacred, my body is sacred, my genitals are sacred.”
  • “All the pleasure and love created here is in service of the sacred.”
  • “I am open to the Divine.”
  • “I feel all the sacred pleasure I’m capable of.”
  • “I’m connected with the life force.”
  • “Whatever happens inside this sacred space is holy.”

Your Altar to Eros

Find a space in your home for an altar dedicated to Eros. If it’s something you don’t want to leave up all the time, use a tray as your altar base so you can move it. Take it out when you want to use it and store it away when you wish.

What do you want to manifest? You may immediately know what you want to focus your magic on. If not, get still, close your eyes, do some deep slow breathing, quiet your chattering brain, and explore what you want to work on. Ask yourself questions such as ‘What do I want to focus on?,’ ‘What do I want to heal?,’ ‘Where do I want to change?,’ or ‘How do I want to grow?’

Areas you may want to play with include connecting sex and spirit, reducing your sexual inhibitions, loving your genitals/body, loving your whole self, seeing the Divine in all or the sacredness of your sexuality. After you have an answer, create an altar or a special spot with items that call your intention and aim to mind.

Let’s say you decide you want to heal your relationship with your genitals and see them as beautiful and divine. You might start by laying down a plush piece of burgundy velvet fabric to represent your delicious blood-filled flesh. Next you might add a seashell if you have a yoni, or an oblong rock or crystal if you have a lingam. Add a red candle to represent the heat and light of your sexual parts. Fill a crystal glass with clear water to represent your sexual fluids and ‘going with the flow’ within a clear and beautiful container. Bring flowers (real ones or a picture)—the sexual parts of plants are a great reminder of the beauty of your own sexy parts.

What else? Whatever works for you. Perhaps a poem or written affirmations. How about a mirror? Can you draw, paint or otherwise create a lovely image of your luscious loins? You can always add to, subtract from or change your altar. In fact, I recommend doing so—it’s a great way to keep it a living representation of how you’re changing and growing.

Now that you have your altar, use it. Pause there before your sex sessions. Light your candle. Chant a love song to your lovely bits. Meditate on your gorgeous engorgeable genitals. Go back to your altar again after you’re done doing. Shower yourself with gratitude for having a body with such exquisite pleasure parts.

What else can you do with your altar? Whatever you want. Use it to manifest whatever you desire, whatever you want to create, you have the power to make magic.

More Erotic Altar Ideas

Place things on your Eros altar that are or represent:

  • The four elements: fire, air, earth and water (a candle, a feather, a stone and a bowl of water)
  • Animals that you feel a deep connection with
  • Representations of your ancestors—pictures, a drawing or their name
  • Deities, sacred beings, spirit guides
  • Religious symbols
  • Nourishment—food like a perfect peach or luscious chocolate. Seeds. An image of food.
  • Nature—flowers, crystals, rocks, shells
  • Scents: incense, essential oil spritzers, flowers
  • Personal mementos
  • Erotic art
  • Journal and pen
  • Drawing pad and art materials and the art you create using them

Creating Sacred Ground

You can create a sacred sex space by drawing an imaginary boundary around your room or bed. Sit in the center and use your finger to draw an imaginary circle. Or walk in a circle around your space while speaking or thinking your intention.

You can create a sacred space by making a real boundary. Make a fabric boundary with rope or scarves. Paint a circle on your floor. Use a special rug or specially designated mattress as a sacred space. Make a circle of candles (safely, please!) Or have candles in the four directions or corners. Whatever you use, only use it for these holy erotic practices.

As you create the boundary, hold conscious intentions to consecrate this space and dedicate it to your spiritual sexual journey.

Engage your sense of smell by burning incense, sage or sweetgrass in your room. If smoke is not for you, try aromatherapy spritzers. Hold a spiritual intention as you circle and scent your space. Examples: “This scent is clearing negativity,” “This smoke welcomes in Spirit.”

When you complete your experience, close your sacred space consciously.

Sacred Sound

There are many ways to bring in sound to enhance the experience of the sacred.

  • Take a few moments and say a prayer for your erotic experience. (Please. Wow. Thanks!)
  • Chant a sacred chant.
  • Tone.
  • Use chimes or a singing bowl to create a sacred resonance.
  • Sing a song that speaks to you of the sacredness of your body, your sex play, your divinity and that of others.
  • Find music that feels sacred to you and play it during luscious lovemaking sessions. I’m a big fan of Qawwali, the ecstatic devotional music of the Sufis. Play music that carries you away.
  • You have an inner soundtrack of pleasure sounds awaiting release. Make whatever sounds of pleasure you want. Umm. Ohh. Aaah. OOOOOO!
  • Alternate sound with sacred silence. Silence provides the space for greater awareness and expansion of the erotic energy.

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