I've been reading the book Red-Hot Touch by the wonderful sex teacher Jaiya and her partner Jon Hanauer. What a great guide, especially for hetero guys, who have been known to feel challenged when it comes to dealing with genital equipment that's so much more complex and confounding than their own!

Red-Hot Touch lays out an entire repertoire of hand techniques that are sure to leave her smiling, if not screaming. They all come, so to speak, with fun, descriptive names. For instance, there's Rock Around the Clit: "We don't need to tell you that the clitoris is extremely sensitive, but what you might not know is that certain parts are more sensitive than others. To find your partner's own personal sweet spot, envision a tiny clock on top of the clitoris, then rub on the hour, every hour. This can be tough since the area is small, but allow yourself to enjoy the time it takes to be precise. And if you closely gauge her reaction at each stop, you may come away knowing exactly what 'time' you should tend to most. Strange, but true: Two o'clock seems to be the most popular Happy Hour among women. We don't know why, but it has proven true in almost every class we teach."

(What time is it? It's CLIMAX TIME!)

Of course, playing skilfully with her juicy bits is only one aspect of what makes a person masterful at the art of touch. There's also the rest of her body (I know, guys, this can be easy to forget, except for specific areas). Since female arousal progresses from the outside in, as Jaiya and Jon themselves point out (as does my partner Sheri Winston, in her Women's Anatomy of Arousal), it's usually a good idea to work your way toward the temple at the center.

It's a sad commentary on our society that we're left to fend for ourselves when it comes to developing competence, never mind mastery, in an area of our lives as important as the bedroom. In a rational world, boudoir skills would be part of a basic life curriculum. Thank you, Jaiya, for doing your part to remedy this situation!